Comic Singaporeans

I never thought that the funniest people in the world would be the Singaporeans. So here's a post in tribute to the funniest island inhabitants, whoever you are.

Here are some of the top 10 most...fascinating comments ever from the tiny island inhabitants.... I mean the island is tiny, not the inhabitants. By the way, if you don't understand some of the vocabulary used, that's because it's not English that they're writing.........it's a product of a million years evolution from Chinese, to Malay, to English and finally to a clever vocal-based language called, Singlish.
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In reponse to an article on rising job cuts and further retrenchments:

"Not surprising la. My stupid boss under pressure from his big boss so he bark like a bloody dog all day long. No substance whatsoever. Just shout his head off all day in office like the whole place on fire. Buay chai bugger"
Posted by: MadKopee at Wed May 13 21:48:02 SGT 2009
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In response to the Singaporean government's latest pro-marriage campaign:

"lidwat.. gahmen* should spend their money on other useful things like helping the poor lah.. things like marriage and procreation should be none of their business, just let nature take it's course.."
Posted by: 0517elias at Wed May 13 13:08:07 SGT 2009

[* gahmen = government ]
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"How nice, gahmen treating it's people like baby making factories, they are saying "anybody also can lah"..
Posted by: pappy at Wed May 13 10:18:15 SGT 2009
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In response to the capture of notorious Singaporean terrorist Mas Selamat in JB, Malaysia:

"so the MHA didnt know he was in malaysia insisting that he was still hiding in singapore even when the malaysian authority had been hinting that he was in malaysia by using huge sign boards welcoming him "selamat datang" Posted by:kongsonglanpahsong at Fri May 8 19:18:15 SGT 2009
[datang = arrive, coming in the Malay language; selamat datang = welcome ]
[Honestly, Mr. kongsonglanpahsong, I don't blame the Singaporean Ministry of Home Affairs. The way the signboards are set up in Malaysia...Mas Selamat could have been anywhere from Kelantan to Lata Kinjang...] -----------------------------------------------------------------------------------
In response to the government's plan to curb the spread of H1N1 flu:

"I wonder if the Minister has in his plans to move any of the patients, if need be and if and when its necessary, across the Straits to JB. Chances are that coastguards won't spot anyone. "
Posted by: sharlynrj at Wed May 13 14:50:43 SGT 2009
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In response to the mass food poisoning case resulting from Rojak that sickened 150 people and killed two :

"Indian Rojak is the domain of the Indian Muslims, not Malay Muslims. The Malays should be contented with selling their traditional Mee Siam, Lontong, Mee Rebus, Gado-Gado etc. Similarly you dont see Shanmugam selling Bah Kut Teh and Wong Kan Seng selling Thosai "
Posted by: sharlynrj at Wed May 13 14:50:43 SGT 2009
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"i ever kena FOOD POISONING a few times also , after eating SUSHII SUSHII it was terrible , i vomiting and vomiting and vomiting and vomiting and vomiting and vomiting and vomiting ......... it was very pain very very pain very very paini almost DIED alsoi NEVER eat SUSHII SUSHII again after that. "
Posted by: madjoker at Wed May 13 16:54:42 SGT 2009
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"aiya, the stall could have sold french cuisine, then would not have food poisoning...."
Posted by: bodoh at Wed May 13 17:32:12 SGT 2009

[Are you so sure, Mr. bodoh ? ]
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"bang sai bo suei chiu* "
Posted by: ahpek at Wed May 19 28:33:42 SGT 2009

[* bang sai = take a crap
bo = no
suei chiu = wash hands ]
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In response to gaps in the primary health care sector resulting from the H1N1 pandemic:

ok. those are small gaps.. look at NEA over our food hygience standards, it is one big crater!
Posted by: pappy at Wed May 13 08:14:20 SGT 2009
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